Thursday, January 3, 2008

I am not just Jennifer's mom, not that I mind. : )

I just had a quick conversation with my daughter and she said something that I thought was funny.

Never have I been a stereotypical mom. When other mom's were telling their children to be careful and not take chances, I was telling mine to test their limits and burn the candle on both ends. I never wanted them to wonder what could have been when the only thing that held them back was themselves. Also, it irritated me to see teenagers who acted like they were middle-aged. Don't get me wrong, I wasn't a 'no rules' mom, in fact, my family thought I was strict.

Anyway, my daughter asked a question and when I answered, she said, "Okay, that's your mom answer, what do you really think?"

It's nice when they can see me as their mom and a person.


NBB said...


My mother is the same as you are, she had rules, but we were free to make our own experiences.

At some point she started to say sometimes "As your mother, I would say this and that, but since you're old enough now, I say that and this." :)

Carol A. Spradling said...

LOL Hi Nina,

It sounds like your mom and I would get along well.

Someone asked my children what their curfew was when they were teeagers. They told them, they never had one. Reason being: they needed to be responsible. I had hopefull taught them that they had to decide if they needed to be where they were and if they stayed out, how did that affect other responsibilities. If you came in at 3 from a concert but had to be at work by 7, you had better be more than capable of fulfilling your obligation to your employer. No calling in sick because you were out late. If you couldn't do it, you came home early. It must have worked, they both have great ethics.

It is funny when they give me a look after I say something. I always add...I'm your mom, I have to say that.

NBB said...

I will show my mom this post and ask about her opinion ;)

We had a curfew until we were about... 15? (and still we were allowed out longer than others). After that, my mom said "I'm responsible for you. If something happens, I have to answer for it. So please act like the responsible person you are. It would be nice if I knew where you are, if you're changing locations." That stopped when I was 18. I was responsible for myself then.
But I still called my mom to tell her I'd be in later as I'd planned when I was already 22 or so (and still living at home). I didn't have to do it, but was does a call hurt? And the positive thing is, if something had happened to me on the way, my mom would have known that something was wrong.

I never felt controlled and I think that's the best way for a youth. Give them rules but don't confine them, or they will run riot while trying to break free.